Miscommunication Misery

Everyone speaks, listens, and reads all the time. But just because we do these things all day long does not mean we are good at them. In fact, it is our mistake in thinking that we are communicating clearly and listening well that creates many opportunities for miscommunication.

In the work place, as in our personal lives, miscommunication sows discord, anxiety, and anger. When there is too much confusion it causes disgruntled employees and frustrated managers.

So what are some of the major sources of miscommunication? It’s important to know where the problem stems from.If you are not being understood, or feel like you are consistently misunderstanding another person, you can change your behavior to increase shared understanding. This will not only make for a happier workplace, but also a more efficient and streamlined one.

Misconceptions 

If you have a new idea and you’re eager to share it, an important thing to overcome are preconceived ideas that can confuse your listener. If you can brainstorm common misconceptions, you can explain them away before your listener uses wrong assumptions. For example, if you want to start streamlining some processes using new software, you need to express the ways that it is different and better from what has been used before. People will have their own set notions of how a process is, so if you don’t explain the difference as well as the commonalities—and stress the most important takeaways then your listeners won’t have a clear idea of what is new and why they should adopt your idea.

Uncomfortable Subjects 

When people are discussing uncomfortable subjects we tend to get stressed out which means that we are not thinking clearly.Different subjects make different people uncomfortable. Some people may feel uncomfortable discussing money or finances, and shut down when the subject comes up. However, if you are discussing compensation with your manager, it’s important to be calm and clear. Other people dislike communicating ideas or facts they feel won’t be received well. You have to overcome your fear of addressing delicate subjects that you feel may be controversial, impolite or personal. If you are operating from a position of respect and are as direct as possible, there will be no need to drag out the conversation or revisit it because it was too clouded in euphemisms to understand the first time.

Receiving Feedback 

Another uncomfortable subject is feedback. Perhaps when people are discussing a project you work on, and you feel like there are implicit criticisms in anything they say that isn’t overtly positive. If you are too sensitive to feedback, this could make you miss out on improvements or simple misconceptions, which once cleared up may not be critical at all and could prove helpful. Even if people are being openly critical about your work, it’s important to listen attentively to examine the merits of the comments objectively, not shut them out and immediately dismiss them as invalid. The more open and receptive you are to feedback, the better you will understand other’s point of view as well as your own.

Generational Gap 

Millennials are entitled and flighty, baby boomers are stubborn and resistant to change. Stereotypes can have a damaging effect on our listening and speaking skills. They create a distorted lens through which we view issues. We should always strive to view people as individuals and not constrain them to our preconceived notions. The generational gap is a common one that causes miscommunication. There are differences in communication style, formality, expectations, modes of expression and more. When you are speaking, you should always have your audience in mind—the more empathetic you are, the better your chances of communicating effectively. This goes for all stereotypes, not just age differences.

Not Listening 

Many times we think we are listening, but we are only hearing what we want or expect to hear. If we practice active listening–that is truly paying attention to what the other person is saying rather than thinking of what we want to say next–then our comprehension will greatly increase.

Miscommunication can cause a lot of grief. It’s frustrating to be misunderstood and it’s hurtful to not be listened to. We can’t change others, but if we can recognize our own behaviors that contribute to misunderstandings, we can effect positive change. We can listen to others better, and have empathy to our audience when speaking. This will enhance your understanding as well as your ability to be understood.